Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
