its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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