put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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