Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I am midnight drunk by noon
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
