There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
