i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
