Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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