This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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