Heybabeimwearingurpanties
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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