that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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