where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Randomize
