Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
