Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
