he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
