I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
