I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize