i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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