The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize