Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
The convent might be a nice break from real life
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize