Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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