it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
So squirting runs in the family.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
