dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize