Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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