How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
