You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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