Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
you inspire me to be a worse person
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
