I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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