Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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