so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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