wrigley field is MILF paradise
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I could fuck to npr.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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