don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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