okay pat passed out under dana's car
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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