PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize