In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize