Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
