People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
