it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
