I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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