he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize