So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
