Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
