Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
