Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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