Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You know, be my cock's hype man.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
