sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
