ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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