as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize