its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize