They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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