I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
