my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I just gift wrapped bread.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I stole a fireplace last night.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
