First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
This is classic penis vs brain.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I want to fling myself into the sun
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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